Cat Calls

Apparently there is a stray cat who is calling a vacant commercial space I’m representing home. I know this because I have gotten three calls from a “concerned” neighbor about this feline. Now I love animals. Adore them. Ask me if I’d prefer to pet a kitten or a puppy versus holding a human baby, and the animals will win every time. But if this woman thinks I’m going to go chasing some feral cat around this dark, empty, and spooky space, she’s got another think coming. Yet that seems to be what she wants me to do, because she keeps leaving messages. I have called her back and told her that the building super has been alerted. That’s about all I can do short of grabbing a butterfly net and an open can of tuna and going on a mission myself. No thanks.

Evidently the cat is doing just fine…he had a pigeon as a meal just the other day, if the feathers behind inside the space are any indication. Plus he has full access to the basement and fire escapes, so even though the woman says “he looks skinny” and offers to rescue him and bring her to her home rescue—she imples that she runs a sort of halfway house for ferals—I’ll bet he’s doing just fine. In fact, he probably doesn’t want our help. He is living rent free in one of the most expensive cities in the world, can come and go as he pleases, and he has free range over a huge space—2000 square feet. HE gets to hunt wild game and doesn’t have to answer to any one. That has to be priceless. Why would he want to give up his freedom to live with this woman? Her apartment’s likely cramped, full of cats and fur, and probably smells of stale urine, cat litter, and that unique feline musk smell that can only be gotten out of a home by industrial strength chemicals normally used to clean places after long-decomposed bodies have been hauled away. Why indeed? Do me a favor, lady: If you really care so much about cats, let this one enjoy his freedom.