Office Politics Blues

Have you ever worked for someone you could barely stand to look at, much less take orders from? I have, and I do.

This particular person takes everything the worker bees say or do in the wrong way. I've been mis-interpreted so many times on this job, I'd started to doubt my sanity. Seems that lately every innocuous remark, or "just FYI" email has been taken as either aggressive, passive aggressive, or somehow offensive in amazingly creative ways I'd never have been able to think up on my own. It must take a lot of talent and hella shitty self-esteem to:

A) Think everything your workers say or do is a personal affront to one's competence as a boss.

and

B) To be so much on the defensive that you manage to mis-interpret even the most mundane of utterances.

Seriously, the world doesn't revolve around you. Or me. Did ya miss that memo? Oh yeah, you did. Because you never read the memos your workers send you and you come storming into our offices bitching and whining about issues that have already been dealt with ten times over. Read the memo. It'll save you a world of stress. (I know you don't give a rat's ass about any stress it'll save us. We're here on this earth for no other reason than to serve you, after all. It's why we were born. It's our reason to live.)

Thank goodness my co-workers are a talented, hard-working, and equally picked on/mis-interpreted bunch. Though I will admit some of them have adapted in Stockholm Syndrome-esque ways that don't seem too functional. I'm like the new prisoner who's all "Hey guys, this isn't fair! We don't have to take this crap."

And they're all, "Yeah, but they give us stale bread and lukewarm water a couple of times a day. Just you wait. You'll be grateful for that someday, missy. Maybe you'll even get watered down pea soup if you're really good."

I hate to be this way, but I think the ol' resume's about to get dusted off for another round of fun. Though there are some major changes coming up at the office, so depending on how those things play out. . .

We'll see. For now it seems the smartest thing to do is to try act like the personal attacks aren't really personal (whatever) and to sip (not gulp!) a glass of fine red when I get home at night.

What a shit way to start the new year.

Happy 2008, folks.